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Happy Birthday Aja!
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Joined: 21 Sep 2003
Posts: 136
Location: The place you would least expect.

PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

**On the cold streets of a city during a dark and rain-soaked night...**

"...All units, please be advised. Notorious serial baker and possible cultist Shadowstorm, alias "The Crazed Confectioner", alias, "Patissier le Diable", has escaped from Dunwich Mental Institution and has been spotted in the vicinity. Eyewitnesses report suspect was last seen wearing a chef's apron and wielding a wire whisk. Suspect is therefore to be considered to be armed and extremely dangerous. In the event of an encounter, officers are recommended to claim that they are on a gluten free diet before radioing in for SWAT and Hazmat Response. I repeat..."

**Local law enforcement, on high alert, dutifully sweeps through the city in patrol cars on a regular basis. Police helicopters cut across the clouded sky, shining their intense spotlights on bakery shopfronts, and random objects of conspicuousness. In other parts of the city, fearful citizens form neighborhood watches, in a desperate attempt to save home and kitchen from what can only be described as a dessert chef gone completely and utterly mad. Meanwhile, in a local pizzeria...**

Well! They may have thought to guard the bread shops and pastry stores, but they'd never think to look for someone trying to bake a cake in a place like this! Now, let's see, where's my recipe book...ah! There it is.

**Picks up a tattered grimoire, written in latin. Loosely translated, the title would be "Lesser Cookbook of Solomon"**

Ok, now let's see if I have everything...

Eggs, check.
Flour, check.
Sugar, check.
6 overlapping pentagrams and corresponding binding circle surrounding the oven...check.

**Quickly mixes all of the mundane ingredients in a bowl, pours the mix into a bundt pan, lights the ritual candelabras, and places the pan into the oven. 30 minutes and the utterance of several words in a long dead tongue later...**

It's done!

**Pulls out of the pizza oven a multi-tiered, fully frosted cake**

I'm positive I was baking a bundt cake....but, I guess I can't complain with the results. Truly nice work.

**A chitin-covered appendage reaches out of the oven and...gives what appears to be a thumbs up**

Happy Birthday, Aja! May this be a good day and year for you!
"Can it be that those in power are on the verge of repeating a senseless and deadly mistake?"~Final Fantasy VI
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Joined: 21 Jul 2002
Posts: 1944
Location: Thataway

PostPosted: Fri Jan 18, 2019 3:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you, guys! Grand Master Goldblum, and the newest incarnation of ShadowCake -- it's hard to imagine a more festive birthday setup than that. Cheese!

*carefully cuts the cake and serves a slice to everyone in the tavern*


*tries a bite*

Oooh... you know, last year's cake was pretty great, but this one? My gosh. The frosting really adds that extra aliquid speciale.

Esta libum est praeclarus, Frater Shadow.

*twirls fork in a complex pattern, etching the lines of an incomprehensible eldritch sigil into the air*

Ave Dominus Libum!
"The one concession a sane man will never yield the universe is that of considering it seriously."
~ James Branch Cabell
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